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Post by jeffpahunter on Jan 14, 2009 11:08:56 GMT -4
Marriage changes passion.....Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it. So I said 'Implants?' She hit me.
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America ?
Now that food has replaced sex in my life , I can't even get into my own pants.
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing I wouldn't have signed up in the first place !
When I was young we used to go 'skinny dipping,' now I just 'chunky dunk.'
Don't argue with an idiot, people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN , AMEN !!
Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school but they can in prison?
Wouldn't you know it....Brain cells come and brain cells go but FAT cells live forever.
And remember: life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end , the faster it goes.
**~~ Have you ever wondered if the earth was a mental asylum for people rejected from a planet more sophisticated than ours.
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Post by zodiakgsps on Jan 16, 2009 10:11:35 GMT -4
I love that last one!!!! I never did until now.......LMAO!!
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